Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Bumpy Ride

How often do you reevaluate the priorities in your life? And how do you decide which priorities go where? I think I may be at a pivotal point in my life journey. Up until this point, I have tried to be all things for all people. Depending on how I measure it, my success rate is anywhere from 30%-90%. It is higher if I look at my ability to say yes to the greater majority of opportunities as a success measure. The lower rate is if I look at my involvement in those opportunities qualitatively. What do I mean? Let's look at what my involvements (priorities) are:

PR/Development Director @ HPFC (full-time)
Barista @ Copper Rock (part-time, mostly just Saturdays/Sundays)
Resident Director @ ABC (full-time...ish. live-in position. boys haven't moved in yet.)
ABC Student Affairs Committee (one meeting/month)
ABC Board of Directors (one meeting every other month...I think?)
MPC Strat Plan Task Force, Moderator (two meetings/month plus work between meetings)
HPFC Marketing/PR Committee, Staff Chair (one meeting/month plus work between meetings)
NPD Planning Committee, Co-Chair (one meeting/month plus work between meetings)
AFP, Vice-President (one - two meetings/quarter)
Rotary Ambassadors, Co-Chair (one meeting/quarter)

On top of all of that, I'm also in Kiwanis, Rotary and PEO. I volunteer at the concerts on Thursdays. I play on the bags league (which will soon be the skeeball league). Oh, and I do have friends and family to see and stay connected with. And then there's this whole faith thing I'm trying to work on. Wait...what did you say? Yeah, that's right. Somewhere in there I'm also supposed to find time to just enjoy being me.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love absolutely everything I am involved in. And I love being busy, I don't know anything else but busy. However, I think I am officially over-committed.  I am a few months over 24 and I feel like I am in a staring competition with burn out, just waiting to see who blinks first.

Here is where my struggle comes in. I do love being so involved, but I know that I'm not giving all of these commitments my full potential. It would be impossible for me to do that. It is also impossible for me to cut the list down to only one commitment that receives all of my attention. However, it is possible and quite frankly, necessary, for me to narrow down this list to something more reasonable. If we look at that list above, and add in the couple other things I mentioned - Kiwanis, Rotary, PEO, volunteering, leagues, friends, family, faith and myself - it appears that I am being pulled in 19 different directions. Whaaaat? 19 directions. One girl.

But what stays and what goes? How many directions are too many? What is the perfect number I am looking for? And then there is the most daunting question: how do I cut things out and face disappointing the person/people I originally said yes to? Yup. There's the heart of this whole mess. I fear disappointment more than I fear burn out. I say yes when I should say no, just to avoid disappointment.

I need to refocus, adjust my priorities, and reclaim my life. I need to make sure that I can say I am truly proud of the work I do with each commitment in my life. To give anything less than my best isn't fair. And it isn't worth it. I am going to need to learn to say no and, in some cases, to step down. I am going need to confront disappointment and stay strong.

Here we go, folks. The ride is about to get bumpy.

Of course Pinterest had a picture for this blog post...